With 2015 almost upon us, that means New Year Resolutions. While the new year is not a good reason to create goals, it appears to be a popular one. Unfortunately for many, it also means stress, frustration and even self loathing as the resolution falls to the road side, yet again.
It does not have to be this way. Setting and achieving goals should not be something you hope for, wish for, yet deep down, realize probably won’t happen.
I want to focus on what is needed to increase the likelihood of success. I wish to offer an observation. If you repeatedly have difficulty accomplishing a health goal or any goal, you have to consider that there is something deeper going on below the surface. It is more than just a lack of “will power”.
What I am presenting are multiple keys to success that need to be present to greatly increase your odds of success. Not all keys will apply to you, though I am sure you can relate to them.
Key #1: An Expression of Self Love – Goals need to be made for the right reason. If you want a goal to be obtainable and lasting it has to be done for yourself. Don’t set goals for someone else, or because you were told to or led to believe that you need it or have to accomplish it.
I realize this can be hard. I am not saying to put yourself first above all else, but you have to be able to make yourself a priority. You have to be importance enough so that you will do what is needed.
This brings up an interesting conundrum. What if you don’t love yourself? What if you harbor ill will against yourself? What if all you learned as a child was how to put others first at your own expense? What if others recognize this and use it against you? What if this is all happening subconsciously?
It is easy to say, “stop hating yourself” but to do so requires a shift in how you approach life. Is it worth it? I would say so. Once you love yourself, you can love others and allow nature to love you back. Do realize that as you become successful others may feel threatened by that success. “Friends” may try to sabotage you or begin to distance themselves as their own insecurities are reflecting outward.
There are many beautiful people having great difficulty being in their own skin. You were given your skin for a reason. It is not a cruel joke on the part of the universe. Everyone has a reason for being and your skin is the perfect vehicle for you to accomplish it. Once you accept your skin and are okay with it, you can begin making lasting changes.
Think of it this way; if you are a parent, you love and cherish your children. Is there anything you would not do to protect and support them? Could anything stand in your way?
If you can understand this love of a child, apply it to yourself. Are you not worth the same degree of love and compassion. Should you not be willing to do whatever is necessary to make yourself healthy, full of energy and vitality and functionally fit?
Assuming you are still following me after that…..
Key #2: Be True to Yourself (core values) – A worthy goal is also in alignment with your core values. Your core values are your deepest most heart felt beliefs which dictate how you interact with people, places and things.
“What if I don’t have core values?” Everyone has them. Maybe the reason you are in your current situation is because what you are trying to accomplish or how you are going about it is not in alignment?
What makes me happy, and why? Why do I do the things I do? Why do some people, places and things bother me or make me feel uncomfortable while others do not. If I’m at a party, why do I migrate to some people and not others. What is it about them, the conversation, the situation etc. that is having such an impact? Start with the basics. There are specific reasons you behave the way you do. You will discover patterns and patterns mean something.
Your body is talented in recognizing whether your behavior is inline with your values. Your body is extremely talented in finding ways to communicate with you when you are not in alignment.
When you repeatedly try to accomplish something yet continue to have the same unwanted outcome, it may be your body communicating that there is an imbalance between what you feel you want, what you need and/or how you are going about trying to get it.
May I offer the idea that your health issues are your body’s attempts to express itself and the imbalances existing within? Rather than fight them and beat them down, maybe you can listen and learn…
What you will recognize and realize is a deeper understanding of who you are. You will see how special and unique you are. You will understand what aspects of your life are worth repeating and pursuing while other aspects should be left behind. While scary at first, it is very liberating.
Key #3: Allow Your North Star to Guide You – Your goal has to be something you want, love or cherish bad enough that nothing will get in the way. Essentially, you goal is a love. Remember the words of Jerry Wesch, “If you have a big enough dream, you don’t need a crisis.”
What you are creating through this process is your North Star. Your North Star is your guide. It is what keeps you on path throughout your journey. If you lose site of your North Star you will deviate from your path and risk becoming lost. We know what happens when one gets lost, they typically circle back around to where they started from. Sound familiar?
Your North Star should be highly detailed, personal and in alignment with who you are and who you are becoming. It is made and executed for the right reasons. You will become an even better and more beautiful version of you.
Key #4: Your Path is True – Once you have your North Star, you can then develop a map that is appropriate to your lifestyle and environment. You know where you are, and where your destination lies. In between are the individual steps waiting to be taken.
As with any map, the terrain has to be considered. While the shortest distance may be a straight line, that same path may be the most difficult to navigate. You need to design a path that takes into account your unique needs and abilities.
If you have created a North Star revolving around fat loss, then a journey that starves the body while it may, and I stress “may” have initial success, it won’t work in the long run.
If you goal is one of creating unlimited energy and vitality, exercising more may be counterproductive.
If the destination is appropriate, but the map directions are wrong, you won’t get there.
The DRESS for Health Success Lifestyle Grounding Program that I offer is more than set up for the task of your journey. It is meant to address not just the environment you live in, but also the lifestyle choices you make within that environment.
If you are having difficulty discovering your North Star, or creating a map of the journey, contact me. We can sit down and discuss some options. What I offer clients is not just what they want, but what they need in order to acquire what they want.
Remember one thing……You are worth the investment!